Fuck This Shit.

So I'm pretty sure I'm gonna quit my job.

I just had a chat with my vice boss during my biweekly (every two weeks?) performance evaluation.  She basically said that the problems I'm having with my boss boss aren't going to go away and that I have to change myself to be okay with them.  There is nothing I can do to enact change or improve his communication skills.  He won't ever change.  He won't ever be aware of or accountable to his staff.  It's pointless.  She didn't say it that bluntly.  She said it in a very subtle, kind way that was supposed to make me be okay with the hopelessness of it all.  But unfortunately I only got the "it's hopeless" subtext, and am not okay with it.

So I'm going to spend the next week seeing if I can't do my job WITHOUT interacting with him.  And if it's still too much of a problem, then I'm out.  Just out.

I was in a relationship once where I thought I had to change myself to fit his perception of what was correct.  Where my opinions weren't valued and my communication style was wrong.  Where whatever he did was right, and what I did was hopefully tolerable.  Where those nuggets of approval were so few and far between that every single one was magical.  And you know what?  I decided a long time ago that I was never never going to let that happen to me again.  This situation included.

I am not some cog in a camp machine.  I want to be a member of a team.  In a camper (not enrollment) focused camp.  I'm out.  I'm just out.